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Adventures in Baseball – Tortured by Singing Children

On March 20th, I auditioned to be a national anthem singer for the AZ Diamondbacks Major League Baseball Team.  I’ve been a singer for 15 years and I was picked to be one of their singers in 2005 and 2006.  The announcer who was running the show at the auditions said that they expected to have 400-500 people and groups audition for the 60-something home games this season.

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There were some really talented people at auditions.  I wasn’t surprised when I got the email that said that I wasn’t selected for this season.  I don’t mind when others are selected above me as long as they are better than me.

One of my pet peeves is singing children.  It is a rare child who can sing well.  I was annoyed last year when I heard that a nursery school class was selected to sing at the Diamondbacks game.  My guess was the team picked them because they would come to the game with their parents and siblings, and spent lots of money on tickets, hotdogs, and beer.

I went to the Diamondbacks vs. Pirates game on April 11th with my parents and they did it again.  As I was looking down on the field during the pregame, I saw a large group of small children gathering near the backstop behind home plate.  They looked like they were about 4 years old.  They sang the national anthem and they were absolutely dreadful.  They couldn’t sing a single note on key and we could hardly hear them.  Mom and I drowned out the sound by singing the song ourselves.  We got a lot of thankful grins from people standing near us.

After the national anthem was over, I was annoyed.  This group of horrible nonsingers was chosen over other talented performers.  If the team wanted to feature child singers this year, that’s fine.  There were enough talented child singers at the anthem auditions that the team didn’t have to use these nursery school kids.  One fan sitting near me said it was a “disgraceful.”

There was a big sign in the stadium that said, “Report Guest Conduct Issues by Texting “DBACKS”<space>location & issue to 69050.  Given the atrociousness of the performance, I thought it was appropriate to notify the stadium about it.  I sent a text that said, “Dbacks home plate singing kids were terrible.  Please don’t do it again.”

The response text I received said, “We’ve recorded your number & ask you only text again for legitimate issues.  You’ll be blocked if another fraudulent message is received.  Thank you!”

I also sent an email to the team on the Diamondbacks website.  If we’re going to call baseball America’s favorite pastime, they should at least get the anthem right.

The rest of the game was awesome. The Dbacks beat the Pirates 15-6 with 13 runs scored by the Dbacks in one inning.  Go Dbacks!

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2 Comments

  1. Addy says:

    Glad I was not present for that game. Bad singing children are terrible!

    I love that they called you text fraudulent. That does not even make sense.

    1. Ruth Carter says:

      I’m sure it was the stock response they send to anyone who reports something that isn’t a complaint about fan behavior in the stands.

      I don’t understand why people think it’s cute to listen to children singing badly. It seems like that belongs in schools, pageants, and other venues that are away from the general public.